I've been OK.

Medical:

I was on a personal high after being discharged from the hospital last August. By every objective measure (clinical tests, blood work, PET scans, etc) my heart ejection fraction has substantially improved since the fall, and I am clean for lymphoma or cancer (the cardiologist wanted the PET scans which happen to also cover internals in detail). Slowly though while improving objectively I seem to have low energy, have lightheaded spells constantly... the doctor team can't really advise. I am on about 10 different prescriptions which I loathe.

I'm healthy-ish but don't feel that great. I stay busy physically and mentally but life has changed.

Mentally:

I'm now in a stoic frame of mind. I realized recently that when my mother in law passes, my wife and I will have absolutely nobody in the world who would miss us or care that we were gone. It's not for lack of trying. Friendships I used to have have faded. I used to try really hard to stay in contact, and tried to be helpful, then got tired of being the only one, then never hear back, and that was that. That happened from about 2008 to 2020. For one reason or another we never click with anyone. We've attempted to maintain friends from say church and usually they have rafts of their own personal problems, or, they are dumb as a board and depressing to converse with.

Socially:

God damnit I just wish I had someone at my level to TALK to.

This board is hosted and ran for you guys at this point.

I don't see anything worth contributing to here. Whenever I post something I am interested in, it is of 0 interest to all y' all. You guys never reveal hobby or lifestyle interests, just political and mass cultural stuff at the surface. So that is why I rarely surface.